A practical guide to postpartum dressing
We ask our friend Sally Tabart for her well-honed, stylish tips on how to get dressed in those hazy first days and weeks of motherhood.
Annie here. I am confident that most women will know the pull of wearing their ‘comfies’: those clothes that make you feel like you’re being softly enveloped and gently held. It’s the same urge that compels women to have baths. Is it a biological necessity that we are suspended in warm water at periodic intervals? Do men have this same urge?? Do we even dare ask???
These instincts arrive in me like a physiological homing pigeon approximately once a month, when my animal brain takes over from my prefrontal cortex. Women cop a lot of shit, but attunement to our bodies is (can be??) a joy. And in these moments of attunement, how we decide to dress our bodies is worth paying attention to.
Dressing with what I’ll call bodily empathy gives us comfort, a sense of control or freedom, and can be a functional tool that makes the day feel easier. This is especially true in those tender first weeks and months after having a baby, as you wrestle with a metamorphosis that nothing can prepare you for.
Soph and I are often asked what to wear, how to dress, and how to think about getting dressed in those first few weeks and months of postpartum life. It’s been almost two years since I entered that metamorphosis, and it’s incredible how many details have dropped out of my brain - like loose lemons dropping out of a wet paper bag. What did I wear? Honestly, fucked if I know.
Enter: Sally Tabart.
Sally Tabart is a writer, a strategist, an editor and a brilliantly creative, generous soul whom I first encountered when we were both scurrying around RMIT together (in some combination of American Apparel and Funkis, no doubt) while studying comms and media. Over the years, I’ve admired her career in publishing. She was one half of the cult-like Ladies of Leisure community and was also the managing editor of The Design Files for several years. Today, she is taking on the biggest role as mother to her beautiful one-year-old daughter, Lila. You could talk to Sally for hours about fashion, design, culture - both high and low - and nobody would make you think and laugh at the same time, at quite the same pace.
We’re so delighted she agreed to write today’s newsletter about postpartum dressing. Her tips are practical but creative, and even if you’re not a new mum or expecting to be, I think you’ll find things you can apply to your sense of style and getting dressed. It’s also chock-a-block with cute links to cute clothes that you can wear if you’re pregnant, newly postpartum, or literally never want to think about kids ever again.
Sending love to all who may be struggling with fertility, and to all those on the journey.
Xx
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By Sally Tabart:
Before I had my daughter Lila in January last year, I thought a lot about what I would wear in the early postpartum months. When you’re pregnant and peering over the abyss into the ‘other side’ it’s truly impossible to know what life is going to be like. New mums are so often portrayed as frazzled, exhausted and on the brink of a breakdown in stained t-shirts, leggings and frizzy ponytails. Would the experience of having a child change me so fundamentally that I would completely lose the ability (or will?!) to dress myself? Would I really not have time to take a shower or run a brush through my hair?! It felt so daunting! It’s not even like I was expecting to put together outfits that were interesting or cool. But I knew that if things fell apart (which they kind of have at times), I would need to, at the very least, feel somewhat put together to make it through. I sound like I’m exaggerating, but I’m kind of not.
Now I’m on the other side, I understand why some days there is simply no improving your appearance. And yes, there have been times when showering got bumped down the priority list. Figuring out how to dress your newly postpartum body can be really fucking hard. Everything is a lot…squishier…and things change and fluctuate all the time. There’s also a very functional element to dressing in the first 6 months or so after having a baby that adds to the conundrum and limits your options. If you’re breastfeeding, your boobs need to be accessible. You’ll likely be getting spewed on quite frequently. Most of your time is spent either sitting/lying down or walking, walking, walking. If, like me, you had a C-section, the idea of anything fitted around your mid section might sound like hell for a while.
When it comes to clothes and how they make me feel, pragmatism has never been at the top of my priorities. But these days I’ve had to give a little on this. It’s so easy to see how you might just end up staying in pyjamas or activewear all day – and I want to be clear, this is ABSOLUTELY a valid and probably very sane decision during this absolutely mental season of life. BUT. I’m here to tell you that if getting dressed is important to your mental health, it doesn’t have to be like that! In fact I truly believe that, with a little planning, the majority of the time you can still assemble some semblance of an outfit and feel like yourself.
I have spent A LOT of time refining my postpartum wardrobe. Don’t get me wrong: I’m not winning any style awards for my performance over the last 12 months, and I’m still having outfit regretsies all the time. But I have spent so much time experimenting with the balance of comfort, style, function and identity. I’ve bought, sold, returned, exchanged, Depop-ed, Repop-ed and donated. I’ve trawled social media for inspo, tried things, made mistakes, cracked some codes, and finally feel like I’ve figured out a refined answer to the question of what to wear when you’re newly postpartum (...just in time for everything to change again when I return to work soon!).
Having a baby and everything that follows is the most transformative, vulnerable experience you will likely ever go through. If you’re freshly postpartum and in a funk, or pregnant and feeling anxious about who the new ‘you’ will be on the other side, don’t worry. There will be a time when you’re excited to leave the house in a hot little outfit again. I’m now in the midst of a new phase where I’m getting my mojo back and figuring out what the new me looks like, and it feels fucking amazing. It’s not going to be trackies forever!
Until that time comes for you, here are my tips to help you feel like you’ve got it together when you’re in the ‘put clothes on body’ phase of postpartum.
1. Consider a postpartum capsule wardrobe: One of my favourite creators for fashion inspo, Ailie Smith, made a TikTok about the idea of a postpartum capsule which really helped me reframe my approach to getting dressed during this time. The first year of being a mum has been such a distinct season that it feels right to assign it a uniform of rotating pieces that can easily be mixed and matched, and are also fit for multiple purposes. For me, this is less about purchasing lots of new pieces and more about reducing the need to confront my whole wardrobe every day. In contrast to the little control it felt like I had over my baby, having a small edit to work within seemed like a relief.
2. Buy multiples: If you find a staple piece that you like, holds its shape, you feel good in and is extremely comfortable, congratulations: you’ve hit the jackpot. Buy it in multiple colours. I LIVED in a brown pair of Alpha60 Romeo knife pleat pants throughout my pregnancy and postpartum. One of my first trips out of the house postpartum was to go and buy a second pair in black. I’m sick to death of them but they’ve seen me through some tough times. I can’t quit them.
3. Get dressed for the night shift: In the first few months where the line between days and nights were hazy, I always got ‘dressed’ for the night. Before the sun went down we tried to reset the house so that we were somewhat prepared for whatever was in store, and the same applied to getting myself ready. The ritual of having a shower, doing my skincare and getting dressed for the night helped with the 5pm scaries (IYKYK).
I had 4 pairs of these pyjama pants and another 4 of this cami that, with a cardi overnight, was extremely comfortable and easy to breastfeed in, but also didn’t make me feel like shit if I wasn’t able to get out of them until 3pm the next day. I also lived in my Mumma Milla leakproof bras and wore the camis a lot overnight.
5. Limit your colour palette: For some people, colour is part of the joy of getting dressed. But I find it overwhelming! If you’re like me, I found it helpful to stick to a neutral palette of black, brown, white and navy, with a couple of my safe colours in there (blue and red). I tried to make bright green trackies work one time and it spun me out all day.
6. Keep it simple (then add accessories): In my opinion, now is not the time to be aiming high sartorially. I found a lot of comfort in finding the shapes and styles I felt like myself in, adding a few cute accessories and just wearing a variation of those things on repeat. I’m a big fan of the scrunchie/necklace combo, even with pyjamas.
7. Don’t splash out on the basics: When talking about how her style had evolved postpartum, stylist Allison Bornstein mentioned that she was no longer buying expensive basics like singlets and t-shirts. This is a little at odds with what we’ve been conditioned to do (invest in quality basics), but I do think there’s something in this for the specific postpartum period we’re talking about. When you’re changing your top multiple times a day (milk leaking, baby spit up etc.) it kind of doesn’t feel worth it.
8. This is all temporary: You know when you go travelling with a very limited selection of clothes, and the second you get home you can’t bear the thought of ever wearing them again? That’s what’s going to happen to your postpartum wardrobe. Invest in a few key things you’ll wear allll the time – for me, that included Nagnata trackies and a pair of Salomon mary jane sneakers – but know that one day you’ll get the ick and will not be able to look at them for a very, very long time.
After much field research, here is my list of early postpartum clothing essentials, plus four easy outfit formulas to file under ‘no sleep’.
The Must Haves:
6 Maternity Bras
8 Elevated Trackies
10 Pull On Pants
6 Relaxed Tees
9 Tops & Tanks
7 Accessories
7 Comfy Shoes
10 Bags (Nappy & Cross-Body)
10 Button Up Layers
Easy Peasy Outfit Formulas For:
The First Coffee Out
The Nap Walk
Visitors Coming Over In 5
The Night Shift
The Must Haves
Maternity Bra
I mainly wore Mumma Mila leakproof bras and camis, and Skims maternity crop tops, but my bigger boobed mum friends said Bonds were the best option. I haven’t tried them, but am very into the look of the First Thing maternity bras.
SKIMS / Maternity Nursing Scoop Bralette — $84
MILK / The Leakproof Essential Milk Maternity Bra II — $99
JUEM / Bernie Bra — $79
MUMMA MILLA / Leakproof Night Bralette — $74.99
JUEM / Jane Maternity Crop — $85
FIRST THING / The Maternity Bra — $69
Elevated Trackies
One step up from pyjamas, elevated trackies are what you change into when you’re getting ‘dressed’ for a big day of being naptrapped at home, going for a walk, popping out to the shops or getting a coffee. Save the super sloppy trackies as a special treat for the days you’re really in dire straits.
DEIJI STUDIOS / Soft Pant — $128 (on sale)
LE BON SHOPPE / Balloon Pants — $160
NAGNATA / Organic Motley Track Pant — $420
BEFORE MARCH / Espresso Recline Pant — $195
PINKY & KAMAL / Odyssey Terry Towelling Pant — $155
ALPHA60 / Ridge Short — $160 (on sale)
BUDDY / Denim Tee Shorts — $129
JUEM / Maya Pant — $119
Pull On Pants
Distinct from the elevated trackies, chuck the elastic waist pant when people are coming over or you’re in the mood to sidestep away from full leisurewear. Having a satin and a poplin pair seemed to get me the most outfit range. Size up!
ASSEMBLY LABEL / Amara Pant — $100
DISSH / Percy Silk Pant — $229.99
ALPHA60 / Cooper Pant — $202 (on sale)
MARLE / Ellidy Pant — $260
ST. AGNI / Relaxed Pants — $279 (on sale)
DEIJI STUDIOS / Flounce Pant — $165
FME APPAREL / Panel Pant — $310
VENROY / Crepe Elastic Waist Pant — $200
ASSEMBLY LABEL / Lola Barrel Pant — $100
FRIENDS WITH FRANK / The Heidi Pants — $249
Relaxed Tee
A postpartum staple for a reason! This sounds easy but requires a bit of trial and error. It can be hard to get the right balance of oversized so it looks intentional and cool, rather than bed shirt territory. Personally, I like a boxy cut.
